Sobriety Sucks – My 7 Month Sobriety Update
I just passed the 7-month sobriety mark and I won’t lie. Much of the past month kinda sucked lol.
I know, I know. You can’t expect sunshine and roses all the time, and it did get better. But I swear earlier on in my sobriety journey I didn’t really see it ever getting like this. It seemed a lot… I don’t know… easier in the beginning.
This month hasn’t been “hard” per se, but I’ve felt bored. It’s hard to explain accurately, but I’ll try!
I don’t miss being drunk but I have missed that initial “whooooooooo!” feeling of unfiltered fun. I’ve missed that false sense of freedom that comes when I’m just a little over the edge. (Let’s highlight the word “false” here because it’s important that we acknowledge that it’s NOT real)!
I’ve checked myself a time or two, trust me. “Am I in denial”? “DO I really miss the act of drinking and being drunk”? The answer is no.
*This post contains affiliate links
Living Sober Sucks (Sometimes)
Living sober does suck a little bit at times, but I can say without a hint of reservation that being drunk sucks way more.
I’ll take a little boredom and nostalgia over hangovers, vomiting, blackouts, embarrassing moments, inappropriate behavior and cringeworthy texts and emails.
Gain Instant Access To Our Helpful Sobriety Resources
Here’s a small sample of what you’ll get!
Alcohol is the only thing I can think of when you only win once you’ve quit. Click To Tweet
Let me tell you, being 7 months into sobriety and not even remotely considering the possibility of drinking again lets me know I’ve won. I really won. I quit… and won.
7 Months Sober Realizations
In my experience, some of the angst and confusion that led me to feel living sober sucks has been alleviated by one realization. Alcoholics are selfish.
I’ve heard this a time or two, but never gave it much credit until now. But yeah, at least for me, it’s true.
It’s sucked because I’m a selfish recovering alcoholic. And I’m committed to working on that.
1. Boredom In Early Sobriety Sucks
I’ve had to give myself a LOT of tough love these past few weeks.
Getting all upset because I miss a certain level of “fun”. Feeling stagnant and a little stuck. I think that’s kind of a selfish perspective for an adult who is perfectly capable of controlling their life.
Maybe this wouldn’t be a “thing” under regular circumstances. I think it’s okay to feel and be bored in general. It happens to everybody, after all.
But being whiny and cranky due to boredom because you are a recovering alcoholic is a different thing altogether.
It’s a selfish alcoholic behavior to consider that a struggle.
This is literally what I tell myself, what I wrote in my personal sobriety journal:
“Self, you’re literally winning. You are sober. You won!
If you’re really that bored, there is always something you can do to help others who are less fortunate. Spend time giving of yourself instead of doing all the taking you’ve done over your drinking years.
Bored? Who cares?
Like seriously, the world owes you nothing. Stop focusing on yourself and what’s wrong. Focus on what’s right.”
Stepping outside of my own head and being of use to others has been incredibly helpful to my mental state lately.
My solution is to be a listening ear, teach someone something, prepare a good meal for a loved one, go take my son to see his grandparents. Be a light in someone’s life and stop thinking about myself.
I have, and I feel a little better.
2. Being The Only Sober Girl At The Drinking Party Sucks
In my first 100 days without alcohol I made – and advise anyone new to sobriety to make – some sweeping changes. One such change is to avoid drinking events and triggering situations and people. It really works to remove that stimulation, and though it may sound extreme, it doesn’t have to last forever.
This weekend, at 7 months sober, I attended an alcohol-filled party that I was a drunken fool at last year. Seriously I drank WAY more than a standard amount.
Before the event, I was a little nervous. Uncertain as to what I’d say or how people would react when I declined their liquor offerings, I’ll admit I considered not even going. Do you know why this is?
Alcoholics are selfish.
Let me tell you… one of the main topics of discussion I see in the sobersphere is “what do I tell people”? “What if people trip out because I’m not drinking”?
Hell… I even wrote an article about excuses for not drinking AND offered a pdf of additional excuses with that blog post!
The truth is, these are selfish alcoholic thoughts in action.
Literally, NOBODY cares if you’re drinking – as long as you don’t crush their fun!
All that worrying I did about what I or people would say was dumb. And I’ve wondered about this the entirety of my sobriety journey.
You know what happened? This:
Them: Hey Allie, you drinking?
Me: No, not today
Them: Aww why not?
Me: I quit!
Me: Yup! Had to do it!
Them: Wow, cool. Great for you!
And I had a great time!
Living sober might seem like it sucks until you get out of your own head, and out of your own way.
Will Sobriety Always Suck?
I don’t feel like it really sucks all that bad overall.
It’s up and down, much like anything else in life.
Today, for example, is a great sober day. I feel amazing, proud of my accomplishment, excited to share what I learned this past month, very confident, NOT AT ALL BORED, and un-sucky.
Maybe tomorrow or next week it won’t be so great.
And that’s okay.
The Beauty Of Sobriety
I think the beauty in being sober is coming to terms with ALL your feelings and tackling them head-on. Finding solutions and ways to cope that you would never have discovered because you were drowning them in a vat of vodka.
All most of us want in life is to continuously improve and become better, stronger, happier, more productive versions of ourselves.
Even though sobriety is hard sometimes, for those of us who just can’t seem to stay on the right track when we’re drinking, it very well may be the only way to achieve those goals.
So, you know… will sobriety always suck?
I don’t think so. But even if it did, I would still choose it and make it work.
Because alcohol has taken so much from me over the years and I finally have most of it back.
Because getting to know myself and experience life on an authentic level is so much more gratifying than the bed of lies liquor had me resting my head on at night. Click To Tweet
Either way, I’m a huge believer in personal power. Some things are out of our control, but we are so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.
I know that I have so much ability to shift negative thoughts and emotions to something better.
And so do you!
So, wherever you are in your journey, I encourage you to think long and hard about what really matters most to you. Think more long-term about the big picture and consider what you can do to achieve the result you ultimately want.
How To Quit Drinking On Your Own
10 Months Sober – Alcohol Addiction Recovery Update
Will I Lose Weight If I Stop Drinking Alcohol?